MY DEFECTIVENESS FACILITATED YOUR GROUND. FINDINGS OF AN EMANCIPATED WOMAN. THANK YOU (IN THE KITCHEN)

Elke de Rijcke

no future out of writing out growing.
plankton kicks me in the jaw jawing at night
twists nightmares around tears away from me

my mountain beaming with its stormy.

kid’s lifetime spanning my life. 

his little crab squeaks in my throat
at this hour of reality gone ferocious.
 
his drawing of faces with smiling eyes
locks my life up, or is it me who locks up life?

the words popping in my head sound stupid but that’s all I got.
 

 

intumescences and perforation of the idea of ​​progression,
administered with a spoon by the father and mother,
then perpetrated by teaching and its machinations.

my game bag terminal end of its own abscesses
I’m on my way to the state of being widowed,
ticket punched in what city?
my body of the future curls up


 

can’t accept my failure in the cage where I’ve been successful
for fifteen years, subcontracted meanwhile by right-wing big shots
repositioning places for pleasure.

I hope the instrumentalization flow coming out
of their hands and mouths
will be screened for them.

I can tell my skull’s shaking under the bell
next thing I’m gonna take the tongue in the gut.

the question of knowing how to continue my constructed meticulousness
proliferates in my throat.
 

 

this age’s requisitions are no longer in keeping with
the skin I sewed together back when
working as my own construction’s carpenter.

time unrecognizably wearing.
 
time I put on today
to make sure I don’t lose what I carry.

how to get the fruit in my head to bear fruit
without drifting off into other plans as soon as I get myself underway?

impossible task.
justice!
it’s up to me to grant it to myself!

acting rationally and out of instinct,

it’s only this way
that my soul will reassume its mission,
will legitimize what is adequate
to what has and will establish me.

 


my vain efforts, so intense during slots to move around,
train me in apnea.

my birth passes away from my rebirth attempts

where my fingers are pointing,
nudged awake by any idea’s startle
at my crops’ pallor.

no one can fly by gaining momentum outside of themselves.
the way I hear it, the age is telling me to keep the doors open.

give me my cloister.

translated from the French by MARGENTO