Ephemeris

Anonymous

ARIES



Firecracker, baby, all guts and glitter. You got it all going on for you. That time you got sick, as a kid, did it. Now, fortune’s funeral director, don’t get fucked over by flatmates, make your own inner circle, you stalker of secrets. A temper like a struck match, quick lit, gone in a flash. Professions galore, you hold grudges, you get even. Your lust for life makes you a good go-between, meddler, my dear. Your indifference around procreation is understandable—there’s a chip on your shoulder. Your flourish! Your appetite for pleasure! You like to wow.



TAURUS



Dear highland bovine, standing your ground, you love to let your hair down after a long day, your home a cozy den to cook up some delicious. You’ve come a long way, baby, from that selfish, trash-talking teen. But that same tenacious foundation made you into the boho babe you are. Earth mama, fierce in festival wear and natural fibers, you’ve sifted through life’s sensual slush pile. You manifest magic. Your friends give you great gifts, bank holiday glamping, chewy reds with barnyard notes, stackable bangles. Be patient gorgeous, your struggles will dissolve if you lean into your re-wilding. Go ahead and put on more chunky stone rings. Channel your inner aurochs and carry on.



GEMINI



Gemini twins take it all in with their quick stride, big-brained beauties open to love. You are fair and forgive, but try not to analyze every gift you’re given, girl! You wander the world full of wonder and will not live where you were born. A bit careless in material matters, success seeks you out regardless. Sociable to a fault, always asked to housesit, you would totally get a tattoo if you could decide on a design! First loves are always lost, don’t fret over that youthful tragedy, all of your scars have a story and your personal yarns will loom large—literary. Some of you are singer-songwriters or otherwise involved in the arts, you are hella talented, have a way with words. People will talk about you. When you are single you make the air sparkle with your twin flame. Find peace in a bespoke spiritual practice, look for your other half in a penultimate chapter.



CANCER



Nobody needs a mood ring to see that those kids born in Cancer’s watery clutches do actually have all the feels. Even the most chill masc bros make free with their inner femme. Sensitive survivor, swap out sentimentality with a safer hobby, say: antiquing. You no longer need to be a victim, the grit getting stuck is what makes the pearl. When everyone has stopped doing dairy, you moon babies still drink the milk. Even badly written romances bring on that one glycerin tear. It’s the start of summer, you’re a good swimmer. Let your hurt dissolve in some refreshing freestyle laps, it’ll take the crabbit out of the crab. Make things right with your mum.



LEO



Yas Queen, you my lovely Leo are the world’s bae. Brilliant sun worshipper, spotlit, your brassy mane is magnificent. A method actor who can weep on cue, you tend toward a big sulk if your roar is ignored. You may fall from great heights, but will land on all paws. Despite your bold words, you speak from the heart, and you’re solid, way below that shiny surface. Learn to listen. Lead with love, and the love you crave so hard will come back to you: pure gold.



VIRGO



Salt-of-the-earth, nature boyz and gurlz, you Virgos keep it clean in vintage workwear with perfectly pressed pocket kerchiefs. Dear organic minimalist, you hold the butter on your oaty biscuits and end each evening with ritualized calisthenics. Calm your hectic intellect, let your nerves and genius rest. Draw a loved one close. Tell us again that story about the sick scar you got, that time you took up welding. These mutable virgins are humble and put others at ease. These healers are forests full of luck.



LIBRA



Airy soul sister, Libra, my fair one, quell your doubts. You’re a prize winner at pros and cons and have a hegemony on harmony. A bit of a mystic, beautiful dancer, you look for insight in the lives of others. You’re adept at character study, have sampled the social life in the most sultry of climates—you could write a novel. A tingling in your feet tells you it’s time to travel. You’ve got the best of both worlds, soft-spoken, indecisive psychic. Mother-daughter duos are highly favored and break through barriers. You get your grace from Venus, goddess.



SCORPIO



Sexy Scorpio, the stars shine for you. You like your lovers to be deep and spirited. You’ve got a singular style and animal strength. Sleek with substance, well-off and worldly, you have connections and run joyously with the jet set. A tasteful tattoo or two and a very talented tongue are your trademarks. Cancel your credit cards, take it easy on the gossip. You are in complete control. If you have a partner, update your status to power couple. Your magnetism will last, try to let go of the past. Wear more red.



Sagittarius



Adventurous Sagittarius your energy is boundless. From the swirling firestorm that is your huge heart you tell your friends to dry their tears, and distract them with your latest metaphysical musings. You are a visionary with an archer’s aim. Your knuckles are inked with l-o-v-e and f-u-c-k, you’d take on the entire world for a lark. What you may lack in tact, you more than make up for in fun. Have mercy on your less expansive sisters, slow down a bit and sketch a plan or two. The world is not as punk rock as you, babe.



CAPRICORN



Goat girls get it done! Their power pulls down all the haters into heaps. These people like to get down to business—even in bed. They can get their kink on and try all kinds of things, but don’t get in their way, they like to be on top. Skittish youthful trysts will only add to their savoir faire. They have no fear. Well-traveled and wicked successful, self-fulfillment without romantic supplement. This earth sign keeps herself well-grounded. On the downside, some dudes might not be able to manage their greed, might mooch off a much older lady, while still chasing tail. Get it together guys.



AQUARIUS



Dreamy Aquarius, rebel altruist, you’re an artist in creating your own sacred liminal space. You imagine exotic utopias on alien worlds and use your fluid intuition to attempt contact with the mother ship. An adorable oddball with blue hair, you even manage to make vegan delicious. With such a serious swimsuit collection, you can’t pack just one bikini, even for a brief yoga-and-hot-springs weekend. Your full deck of friends knows that you’re not just quirk. You are happiest when unattached. But when you do get that old longing for a lover, steer clear of the saturnine kind.



PISCES



Dear Pisces, magical mermaid, you have the power to create your very own reality. You’re an adept diver in the primordial Jungian soup, but find an anchor, sweet water sign. Practice presence. Avoid substances and cynicism. You have the keen wit to be wise if you can establish a little objectivity over your vast emotional sea. Replace forced bougie philanthropy with genuine generosity. Tap into your inner artist and you will stay true to a life filled with beauty and love. Be the dreamy conjurer you were born to be.

translated from the Old Scots by Gnaomi Siemens



Copyright of the images is stated as belonging to Morag Eaton and they cannot be reproduced without permission. For more information, check out her website here and her Instagram here.

Before the Dog Star rising was a harbinger of the annual flooding of the Nile, before the scratches on clay tablets of the ancient Babylonians, before the standing up of the mysterious Stones of Stenness by neolithic peoples way up in Orkney, from the utmost edges of memory humans have looked to the stars in wonder and speculation. Horoscopes are nothing new.

In 1503, the Paris publisher Antoine Vérard brought a collection of horoscopes into the world in one of the first printed texts of the Scottish language, as, the Calendar of The Shepherds. A kind of popular almanac style of publication (containing things like remedies, religious musings, and astrological information, along with some spectacular woodcuts), the book was translated by an unknown Scottish translator from an earlier French version circa 1497 called Le Compost et Kalendrier des Bergiers. The Scottish version was followed by a later English translation, which eventually became the inspiration for Edmund Spenser’s 1579 poetic work The Shepheardes Calendar. 

Horoscopes (hora / time, skopos / observation) are ephemeral. Translation is an observation of time and a holding up of the writings and ideas of one time to observe them in a new temporal context. This new take on these Old Scots horoscopes reassesses a bit of historical ephemera and looks to animate and recalibrate the position of the female-identifying voice in history. Prose poem-esque, with a few wee nods to bonny Scotland, the twelve signs of the zodiac gather here, a circle of animals, non-binary time travelers to the stars.

Who wrote the original text?

J. F. K. Johnstone mentions The Kalendayr of the Shyppars in his 1929 “Bibliographia Aberdonensis”, a two-volume catalog of books by authors from Aberdeenshire, printed between 1470-1700. In it he records that on June 23, 1503, a small quarto of 96 unnumbered folios with a missing folio, kept in the Duke of Devonshire’s library in Chatsworth, was printed by an unknown printer, but most likely published by Antoine Verard, as the book contained woodcuts that belonged to said French publisher. It was a translation of a French original by an anonymous author, published as Le Compost et Kalendrier des Bergiers, by Guiot Marchant, who had issued five editions of it between the years 1493 and 1500. The translator of the Scottish version made use of the 1497 edition. Johnstone, did extensive linguistic research throughout his life to find the translator of the Scottish version, convinced that the translator was a Scot from the Aberdeen area, educated in France. Though none of his theories were ever proven, and he himself didn’t publish his research in his lifetime (in fact it remains unpublished), his pick was a young priest called Alexander Barclay whose birthplace is unknown, but was believed to be Scottish, and who perhaps matriculated to the University of Paris around 1504. Barclay’s attributed works include “The Ship of Fools” and a translation of “Mirrour of Good Manners”, from the Italian. He eventually became a monk and a friar and died in 1552. It seems Barclay was very free with his translations, often adding his own lines and subtracting things at will. There is no way of knowing if this multi-cultural preachy monk, who may have been born north of the icy waters of the river Tweed, actually translated this quirky old almanac, but it seems that the imperfect art of translation has washed this odd ephemera up on shore to be discovered by a new era of readers regardless.

Gnaomi Siemens holds an M.F.A. from Columbia University’s School of the Arts in poetry and literary translation. Her work can be found at Words Without Borders, The Believer, Slice Magazine, EuropeNow, The American Journal of Poetry, Penny Thoughts (UK), and American Chordata, among others in the United States and abroad. She has read her translations at The British Library’s Anglo-Saxon Kingdoms exhibition in London, was selected by The Poetry Society of New York for a residency at the iconic mid-Manhattan branch of the New York Public Library, and was a 2019 ALTA Travel Fellow. Her manuscript The Errant was a finalist for GASHER Journal’s first book prize. She lives in New York City. For more information visit her website here.

Morag Eaton lives in Berwick-upon-Tweed, a town in England that is almost Scotland, in an area known as “The Borders” which spans the two countries—a region with its own identity, rich in folktales and lawless for centuries. A contemporary reworking of folklore and superstition is a theme in Morag Eaton’s work, having illustrated The Red Hall or Berwick 1296, and The Blacksmith’s Wife of Yarrowfoot. For information about her work, or to inquire about original prints of the Ephemeris images, visit her website. Follow her on Instagram here.